Lessons I'm Learning Number Two.

Hello old friend♥

It's been a while since I've really written in here, or shared my heart with you guys, so today that's what I'm going to do.

I know I've mentioned it a few times, but I am currently coming out of one of the more difficult seasons I've had to face. For those of you that know me, you may or may not have known this. I think that's part of what made this season so difficult... I've faced most of it on my own. But I've also learned many, many lessons from everything I've been through, some I'm glad to have learned, others I wish I hadn't had to. But the fact is that I did learn, and I'm going to be a stronger person because of it. So, if you remember before, I did a post on Lessons I'm Learning, and I'm going to do so again now. I figured that would be more important than hearing all about my problems, right? So here goes.

1. Sometimes, all you can do is keep breathing. I've had those days, far too many to count, actually. Those days where you can't make sense of anything going on. I've spent days confused and upset and angry and hurting. I've been so upset that I literally felt as though my breath was caught in my lungs. It's most definitely not where I want to spend a vast amount of time. But sometimes I think we go through those moments so that our lungs can be reminded how much they like the taste of air.

2. Trust. I'm still really working on this one, and it's probably one of the hardest lessons I've had in a very, very long time. I'll be honest and say that I have major trust issues. I put up big barriers, walls that I keep around me to stop others from seeing the yucky, the messy, the broken parts of me. I know it's not the best way to live either, but it's just the way things are for me for now. I'm working hard, breaking down some of the mortar holding the walls so tightly. Maybe some day soon I'll find enough of a crack for a breakthrough.

3. Forgiveness. Definitely a work in progress. I think forgiveness is one of the harder lessons that anyone has to learn in life. I tend to be fairly decent at forgiving other people, but I have a more difficult time with forgiving myself. I've messed up a lot, and I've spent a lot of time feeling unforgivable. I'm in the process of letting God's truth speak to me If He can forgive me, I should be able to as well.

4. Sometimes, all you need is for someone to listen. Sometimes, I don't need or want advice. Sometimes, all I want is for someone to sit and hear me out. Someone to consider me important enough to listen, to just want to sit and be my friend. I know I'm going to make mistakes, to mess things up, but telling me what I should do or should have done doesn't help. Let me make some mistakes, and then stand by me if I do end up hurt. Don't say 'I told you so'.

5. Beauty is much more than what you see in the mirror. I think everyone could tell you at least five things they would like to change about the way they look. But really, none of those things are what makes people beautiful. Beauty is found in the way someone cares, loves, listens, and speaks. Beauty is found in someone's laugh and inside of their arms when you hug them. Beauty is who someone is on the inside, not the out.

6. Life is beautiful. Seriously, just look around. And when you've been knocked down, it puts you in an even better position to stop and look. Never miss an opportunity to observe the beauty that fills this world.

7. People will surprise you. People I thought would always be there for me have gone away, and let me down. But also, some people I couldn't imagine ever being close with have become my best and dearest friends.

8. Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end.

9. Take some chances, regardless of their perspective consequences. You have to be willing to take risks, or you'll never experience the life that is available to us. I'm working at this one, too. And I'm telling you this because I want ya'll to hold me accountable. Help me to not back out.

10. It's up to me how I choose to live each day. I am going to choose more happy, more fun, more joy. It's up to me, and I'm going to make it the best I can.

So, there it is. 10 lessons I'm in the process of learning. What are you learning lately?